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Look, if I'm going to be an old lonely guy, I'm going to need a thing. A hook. Like the guy in the subway who eats his face. I'm thinking I could be the crazy man with a snake. "Crazy Snake Man." Heh? Then I'll get more snakes and call them "my babies." Kids won't walk past my place, they'll run. "Run away from 'Crazy Snake Man!'" they'll shout.
~Chandler, certain that his future holds loneliness and mockery
*
Hitting her with a frying pan is a good idea, but let's have a backup plan in case she isn't a cartoon character!
~Chandler, helping Joey defend himself from an obssessed fan
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Hey, look what I got for you. It's a Slinky! Remember? "What walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, everyone knows it's..." just a big spring.
~Ross, plying an angry Rachel with gifts
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